On Friday, I had a guided 5MeO-DMT experience with John Gorman of psychedelicmeditation.org. I let him video our session so that he can use it in his facilitator course that he is developing. He recommended taking small 3 second inhales and then hold them for 20-30 seconds. Then after a minute or two decide if you want more. 

I was quickly in a realm of okayness and space. I was however still aware that I was lying on the floor and that John was there. I still had some habitual thoughts. I identified some parts, like a self-conscious part and a part that holds fear of letting go. John gave me some really useful teachings: ego death is a fallacy. You can take ALL of you with you, you don’t have to reject or overcome anything. He also said that our normal awareness and our body is like a child, we can just take are of it, but not be it. It helped me with the part of me that is in charge of my decisions and direction when guiding my mind. It is actually pretty young and doesn’t like to let go of control. During a moment of come down, John and I gazed at each other for quite a while. It really helped me connect with his vast mind that has let go off his conceptual mind so many times through meditation, LSD journeys and 5-MeO. While I was taking a couple more hits, I still looked at him. Everything but his face disappeared, his face became really fuzzy and dissolved as well. Then all of a sudden there was just stillness. There was just open space. There were no bounds, just bright open space. It was beautiful and in some way familiar. It felt like after a short time of being in space itself I leapt up, exclaiming: “Oh my God! This so beautiful!” John immediately recognized that I had been there, and he said: “Congratulations! That’s why we do this. I am so happy that you got to have this experience. We go back again and again and familiarize ourselves with this space of being.” 

Yes, yes, yes! If we can rest in the openness without bounds, all our fears, all our limitations are completely included. They can also witness that wide open space. So they learn that it is not all about being in protector mode, They know more who I truly am: wide open space. 

Then on the next day, I happened to sit in with a guided Cannabis-Assisted Psychedelic Therapy session for a client with Angela of alteredhealing.com. She rented my office, so I didn’t have far to go! It wasn’t really planned for me to be in two psychedelic spaces two days in a row, but it really worked out well!

Angela was okay with me taking part of the imbibing ceremony, so I vaped a puff of Cannabis for the four directions and the inner space. The way she guides, is true guiding, like a shamanic practitioner would take you on a shamanic journey. We also did some breathwork, that further grounded the experience. 

It was easy for me to enter the spiritual space, as I had just been opened up through the 5MeO experience the day before. I was there to hold space for the client but, so spirit was running through me and was coming out through my heart, my hands, and my feet. I also was able to mother all my parts that usually feel they have to do the job, and they don’t think that they need mothering. I was able to give them l love! They needed it, so once they received it, they were able to look at the true me. It was very large and went up into the cosmos forever. I updated the part that there is no need to restrict myself, to be worried about people’s opinions of me. I realized that there is a part of me that is pretty young that guides the sense of my progress. It feels what I am experiencing is new and amazing and it doesn’t see that I am already a mature, wise woman, and everything I do in my life as a therapist, space holder, spiritual practitioner, board member, lover, friend etc. already comes from that deep place of wisdom. I was able to see my spirit.  It’s not at all what ails us. That is just a small portion of us, that we are often caught in, and then it takes up all the space. So I was my spirit, I was fully allowed to be creative, open, with great ideas and intentions. I had a wonderful feeling that life will unfold in miraculous ways, furthering confidence in my abilities, trusting my wisdom, feeling connected to the people I know and love. There was a particular insight around the superiority/inferiority complex. Most people go up and down between the two, often unconsciously, including myself. As the client was going through his deep process of tending to and letting go of his pain, experiencing vastness and love all around him, I got to this open compassionate space right in the middle, the place where we realize that we are all divine beings, with the same potential, just in a similar predicament, where we lost sight of who we truly are. But this spiritual psychedelic space shows us who we truly are and sheds light on the parts of us that need and receive healing. 

I felt like Cannabis-assisted journeying as well as 5MeO assisted psychedelic meditation greatly complement each other. I feel that the guided journey with Cannabis does the ground work in the world of form and 5MeO moves us into the absolute space. I can see a great collaboration starting